True-to-being Memory

(This is a Virtuous Leadership article originally published in Finnish here.)

A leader has a good memory. By memory (Lat. memoria) I mean much more than just our natural ability of recollection. Neither am I referring to some “mnemo-technical” capacity not to forget.

A good memory means above all “truthful” memory. Josef Pieper calls it “true-to-being” memory.

This means that we remember real events and real things as they were and are, truly, not as we would like them to be. Whereas a truthful person speaks the truth, truthful memory remembers the truth.

An obvious truism?

Does this sound obvious to you? Let’s think about it.

A young boy whose tendency to exaggerate, by the time he’s an adult, has got out of control… A young couple who never seem to agree over the details of past arguments… A leader whose autobiographical memoir is a petrified epitome of self-admiration…

Truthful memory is not a truism!

At the heart of wisdom

According to Thomas Aquinas truthful memory is the first prerequisite of prudence. It is the cornerstone of wisdom. It is easy to see why this is so.

Prudence, the virtue of the decision maker, springs from the ability to grasp reality. Prudence seeks to base all action and decisions securely on reality. Reality is the objective world – the real things, events and experiences – in which we live.

But the truth about these things, events and experiences, the truth about the world, is “contained” in the truthful memory.

The pitfalls of “bad” memory

This is actually an important observation. For if truthful memory is the cornerstone of prudence, untruthful misconstruing memory is the stumbling block of prudence.

Josef Pieper writes: “Nowhere else is the danger so great as here, at the deepest root of the spiritual-ethical process, the danger that the truth of real things will be falsified by the assent or negation of the will.”

He continues:

“The peril is the greater for its beings so imperceptible. There is no more insidious way for error to establish itself than by this falsification of the memory through slight retouches, displacements, discolorations, omissions, shifts of accent. Nor can such falsifications be quickly detected by the probing conscience, even when it applies itself to this task.” (Prudence, ch. 2.)

How to train our memory?

Before I introduce a few practical guidelines it is important to remember that, if the fault lay in the foundation, mere white-washing the walls will not suffice.

Again Pieper: “The honesty of the memory can be ensured only by the rectitude of the whole human being which purifies the most hidden roots of volition. Here it becomes apparent how greatly prudence, upon which all virtue depends, is in its turn dependent at its very fundaments on the totality of the other virtues.” (Prudence, ch. 2.)

Alexandre Havard writes: “At the heart of the virtue of prudence is the relationship of a leader’s character to his ability to grasp reality. In other words, the relationship between being and perception, between what we are and what we see.” (Virtuous Leadership, p. 68.)

“The good man judges each class of things rightly, and in each the truth appears to him” says Aristotle (Nichomachean Ethics, III, 4).

Havard elaborates: “The proud man, on the contrary, judges as true whatever flatters his pride; the intemperate man, whatever may grant him power, money, or pleasure; the small-minded man, whatever justifies his cowardice or laziness.” (Virtuous Leadership, p. 68.)

Read Aristotle’s quote and Havard’s comment again but replace the word “judges” with remembers.

We see, interpret and remember things through the lenses of our character. By strengthening our character, in other words by strengthening our virtues, we develop our memory purified by truth.

Practical advice

Because memory is at the heart of prudence, much what applies to the training of prudence in general applies to the training of memory as well. Steps (1) and (2) are from the Virtuous Leadership article “Prudence”.

1. Avoid rationalizations at all costs.

To rationalize is to twist objective data, consciously or unconsciously, to make them fit our pre-conceived notions. Rationalization is a psychological process that distorts reality until it accords with our passions and interests.

2. Recognize and put aside your prejudices.

Rationalization has roots in cowardice. Prejudice stems from ignorance.

Overcoming prejudices requires the training of the virtue of humility, that can be called “the habit of living in the truth”.

Stephen Covey explains: “One of the characteristics of authentic leaders is their humility, evident in their ability to take off their glasses and examine the lens objectively… Where there are discrepancies (prejudice, ignorance, or error), they make adjustments to realign with greater wisdom.” (Principle-Centered Leadership, p. 20.)

3. Practice objective testing.

Heidi Robert’s Virtuous Leadership Guest-article “A Pound of Prudence” includes to practical advice which support the practice of truthful memory as well.

Roberts writes about emotionally charged signals.

“Emotional signals have the tendency of disfiguring the interpretation, making it selective and adjusting emphases in accordance of the receiver’s preferences… One can practice objectivity by, for example, trying to remember the details of a certain event, such as a conversation, without emphasizing the emotional response.”

Much depends on our ability to “adjust our emotions so as not to allow a single emotionally charged message to wholly usurp our thoughts”. Or our memory, for that matter.

Confessions of leaders

Earlier I mentioned the sugar-coated autobiographies. To counterbalance their influence I can wholeheartedly recommend an autobiographical classic that was published recently, about 1600 years ago.

Reading it will confirm in your mind the truth of the platitude “There’s nothing new under the sun”. I’m talking, of course, about St. Augusine’s Confessions.

As the title implies, the confessions are far from being sugar-coated. It is the exemplar of the development of truthful memory. The reader is in for a full treat.

Further reading:
St. Augustine, Confessions.
Heidi Roberts, “A Pound of Prudence” (in Finnish 2009).